boobs of JUSTICE!

Jealousy, probably the most useless emotion someone can have, wreaks havoc on relationships. I've never been bit by the jealousy bug. Of course, I have twinges, but they have become less frequent than in my youth, and I'm pretty successful in obliterating any signs of jealousy. Not true for a good friend of mine. Late into last night I was pestered with a cell phone that would not stop receiving text messages from a friend in a fit of jealous rage. Myspace is being the bringing of bad news, her boyfriend has *gasp!* a busty skinny blonde as one of his top friends. hopping hoes Batman!!

I'm not good at counselling jealousy. I don't suffer. She does. Ranting and raving, I just don't relate. This morning, trying to be a better friend than I was at 10 o'clock, I send the olive branch text: "How are you? Still mad? Did you talk ...." blahblah. She calls, we talk. Trying to get me to feel what she is feeling, she does the whole "how would you feel if you boyfriend had a picture of a skinny ass brunette with her double whammies hang out in his top friends on myspace? You know, the type to totally get his rocks off with?" Hmmm, checking the 'ol Devil-space, I think "You mean, besides me?" but don't verbalize that thought. No other chocolate haired ladies with enormous glands for the hands, but now he has a blonde with her big 'ol kettle drums hanging out. "I dunno, I guess if he's gonna cheat, he'll cheat. Nothing I can do about that. Insha'Allah. and nice baby pillows." In an effort to challenge her daft boyfriend, she posted a pic of her with some massive crack-of-God cleavage, jumbo queen jewel sight. Do I want that on my boyfriend's page? *shrug* who cares. I find it funny now that I know why it is there, and the damage it is doing to her relationship. (I do not now, or ever find the destruction of a relationship funny)

In her attempt at making her boyfriend jealous by what I will forever call "the boob pic, (or maybe 'the prisoner of playtex prison' pic)" she went to her friend's devilspace pages and posted comments explaining the love jugs. In these comments, she called his lady friends sluts and hoes. In her mistake, she thought she was sending a private message. Many phone calls have been made to me wondering how her man knew she called them these probably wholesome Christian ladies (yeah, right. who is wholesome now days?) sluts, hoes, etc. Upon explaination of the clear-as-day comments with the works 'sluts,' 'hoes,' 'jealous,' and 'boobs', I could feel the heat through the phone from her burning red cheeks. So funny.

So maybe she learned. Probably not. I told her that the jealous was a by-product of her own insecurity. How can you have a successful relationship when it's riddled with jealousy, attempts at making the other jealous, arguments, power struggles and a complete lack of fun? I don't know, I've been asking myself that for about 3 of their 3+ year relationship. As for the pointer sister's pic, it's gonna be infamous. Who doesn't love boob euphemisms?