day planner
Tired. I've started having sympathy exhaustion for myself. Career. Maintenence (whatever it takes to look and feel good). Relationships. I'm starting to believe that the average human being can only handle two, but I know I will drive myself to exhaustion trying to juggle all three.
After securing myself a paycheck and reason to live between the hours of 9:00am and 5:30pm, my thoughts now turn to contructing my days, weeks, months around this time-consuming rock. A natural born planner, I'm looking forward to the structure, a routine I can sink my teeth into. I have reached a point in my life that necessitates a day planner. I can only skip so many dinners with a friend, or miss my little sister's talent nights without feeling like I am lost to their lives, or a complete ass. And, one of the most alluring and educational parts of my new position is the ability to attend depositions and hearings with the attorneys, something I wait for with that anticipation usually reserved for baseball season. With my step mom's cooking classes and birthdays, I have resigned myself to getting a memory assistant. Actually, after spending two weeks blowing off my best friend John 'cause I have already planned something on the days we set to hang out, but forgot, sent me a clear and distinct sign.
I can see my free time shrinking as the days approach job time. No longer can I meander to the gym at anytime; postponing it till after Martha will not do as I will already be sitting behind a desk during that time slot. I'll have to see the man on the weekends, that will also be my sleep-in time, maybe see the friends on week nights, wait that's family time. Maybe incorporate friends and the man time, although that has failed miserably. And the gym? I require at least 4 days of perspiration, guess I will forego sleep for early morning cycling. Which means it will be impossible to sleep in on the weekends 'cause my clock will be off. School. s**t balls, I knew I'd forget something. What about school? When will I study? Do homework? I'm trying to meditate too, when does that fit in? After family time, before teeth brushing, prior to sleep, on weeknights? Like some crazed sudoku of my life, I try endless pieces in different boxes to see if the puzzle computes. So far nothing.
At my previous job I overworked. Frequently 50 and 60 hour work weeks would float me by, fueled by insomnia and bad coffee. I was always up at 4:20 in the morning to go to the gym, and always sit in bed for hours trying to sleep when I got home. Fortunately I lived with a don't-ask-don't-tell roommate that partied continuously. I was also a hermit. My dog was my friend and that was all I wanted. Social gathering were of no purpose, nor were they welcomed. But now, there's the man, and I got my 'boobs of justice' friend that is in constant need of attention and counseling. I love being around my family. And I am unwilling to quit the gym. But, anyone that knows me knows that career comes first, which in this case is goes hand in hand with my schooling. I can't be an attorney without first graduating from college, then law school, and finally passing the bar, no matter how smart I think I am. And try as I might, my Ma refuses to pay for schooling, damn. Guess I just have to appreciate my self-funding schooling more and buy a day planner. But I'm still gonna purposely forget birthdays.
After securing myself a paycheck and reason to live between the hours of 9:00am and 5:30pm, my thoughts now turn to contructing my days, weeks, months around this time-consuming rock. A natural born planner, I'm looking forward to the structure, a routine I can sink my teeth into. I have reached a point in my life that necessitates a day planner. I can only skip so many dinners with a friend, or miss my little sister's talent nights without feeling like I am lost to their lives, or a complete ass. And, one of the most alluring and educational parts of my new position is the ability to attend depositions and hearings with the attorneys, something I wait for with that anticipation usually reserved for baseball season. With my step mom's cooking classes and birthdays, I have resigned myself to getting a memory assistant. Actually, after spending two weeks blowing off my best friend John 'cause I have already planned something on the days we set to hang out, but forgot, sent me a clear and distinct sign.
I can see my free time shrinking as the days approach job time. No longer can I meander to the gym at anytime; postponing it till after Martha will not do as I will already be sitting behind a desk during that time slot. I'll have to see the man on the weekends, that will also be my sleep-in time, maybe see the friends on week nights, wait that's family time. Maybe incorporate friends and the man time, although that has failed miserably. And the gym? I require at least 4 days of perspiration, guess I will forego sleep for early morning cycling. Which means it will be impossible to sleep in on the weekends 'cause my clock will be off. School. s**t balls, I knew I'd forget something. What about school? When will I study? Do homework? I'm trying to meditate too, when does that fit in? After family time, before teeth brushing, prior to sleep, on weeknights? Like some crazed sudoku of my life, I try endless pieces in different boxes to see if the puzzle computes. So far nothing.
At my previous job I overworked. Frequently 50 and 60 hour work weeks would float me by, fueled by insomnia and bad coffee. I was always up at 4:20 in the morning to go to the gym, and always sit in bed for hours trying to sleep when I got home. Fortunately I lived with a don't-ask-don't-tell roommate that partied continuously. I was also a hermit. My dog was my friend and that was all I wanted. Social gathering were of no purpose, nor were they welcomed. But now, there's the man, and I got my 'boobs of justice' friend that is in constant need of attention and counseling. I love being around my family. And I am unwilling to quit the gym. But, anyone that knows me knows that career comes first, which in this case is goes hand in hand with my schooling. I can't be an attorney without first graduating from college, then law school, and finally passing the bar, no matter how smart I think I am. And try as I might, my Ma refuses to pay for schooling, damn. Guess I just have to appreciate my self-funding schooling more and buy a day planner. But I'm still gonna purposely forget birthdays.
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TheJoeD on
"I'm starting to believe that the average human being can only handle two, but I know I will drive myself to exhaustion trying to juggle all three."
Amen.
Amen.
